Christmas 2022: June is Now a Hat, “WTF, Mariah Carey” and Being the Light

Hello to my four readers! Are you still alive? Am I? Do we all still have Wi-Fi?

If you’re in any of the places which has suffered a devastating tornado or hurricane or blizzard or war or uprising,

or if you live in Milwaukee proper…

you may not now have life or internet access.

If you don’t have life, and you’re in fact dead then it’s a real honor for you to be reading this right now.

And for the rest of you, it’s so nice to talk at you again.

I hope you’ve been doing okay and are staying healthy and safe.

Christmas Can Be Tough

I don’t know about you but this Christmas season has felt especially MEH and so I didn’t even get out half the Christmas shit.

The only sentimental thing that was removed from the basement storage is an animatronic Christmas lion a now-dead friend insisted I buy a couple years ago and that’s only because the lion stared at me so sadly I couldn’t refuse it.

“Yes, crying, sad Christmas Lion, I will get you out.”

“And, yes, spooky as fuck Christmas dolls, I will also get you out because you may otherwise murder us in our sleep.”

A casual observer would think I still went all out for Christmas so it’s okay.


And we bought the fattest tree we could find and I decorated it on my own because it doesn’t have to be a party.

Sometimes you just have to fake it, go through the motions and get through it.

I LOVE Christmas so I hope the feeling comes back next year.

I am actively listening to The Roger Whittaker’s Christmas Album right now so I’m sure I’ll be SUPER annoying about Christmas again.

My husband David just hooked up the speaker so we can be fully “Whittakered”, as he put it.

June Is a Hat

So the dog we rescued a year ago is still broken. As I write this, she is staring at me from across the room where she is actively refusing to eat her food after David forced her to sit over there to go through the motions of trying to stay alive.

And she’s very “No.”

However, she now dominates at the dog park and seems to be a speed spaz demon. Like me, she came alive in October.

She apparently just needed a little time in Canada.

I can’t share a video from our time in the U.P. despite the amount of money I pay to maintain this site so I’m going to demonstrate our formerly paralyzed-by-trauma, anorexic dog’s transformation in a series of screenshots which also unfortunately features June’s friend Maddie defecating.

Like a traumatized teenager, June still can’t express her love through the normal communicative channels.

When she snuggles close to me on the couch, I can’t touch her or she will dramatically withdraw and glare at me like YOU JUST RUINED EVERYTHING OMG I HATE YOU.

So now I stay still and don’t react when she snuggles close.

And now she puts her head on top of my head so it looks like I’m wearing a June hat.

She is the weirdest dog I have ever known.

From her awkward place behind me as I type this, the mogwai mutters in response, “You’re weird.”

“Mariah Carey, You Will Never Be the Queen of Christmas”

Recently, I had a nice meeting with a young person who was added to my caseload. He absolutely loved the winter outfit I styled for him from my organization’s warm clothes donations donated by a local church. He is super picky so his mom had told him, “Why would you even tell this poor lady to bring you any clothes. I’ve been trying to find you a coat for 2 months.” He told me that he had responded, “I just have a good feeling about this one, Mom.”

I did not let him down, superficially.

And then we really bonded over our mutual distaste of trashy Christmas music.

He said his mom only plays Mariah Carey and Destiny’s Child Christmas albums on repeat for the entire season and it made him want to burn the CDs in a public display in an attempt to take back Christmas.

“What happened to traditional Christmas music?”

“You mean Johnny Mathis, Nat King Cole…?”


Right? Seriously. what is wrong with her. She has like 2 Christmas songs that are okay. The rest is pretty shit.”

“Complete shit.”

“Yeah and 2 songs do not royalty make.”

“For sure. She’s crazy. Hey Mariah! Reality is calling. It’s been a minute, honey. Pick up.”

It’s not often a CCS coordinator, a Medicaid social worker and a kid with a TBI click as well as we clicked that day but it was great.

“Who can be queen of an entire season anyways. Girl, get over yourself.”

Hold On and Be the Light


It’s Christmas! Happy happy happy! If you’ve got violence or sickness or bodies or badness, throw some lights over it and start singing because if you don’t, those bodies sure as hell aren’t going to.

I guess that’s what Christmas is to me now. Not superficial “gloss over all” but… at the end, we’re just light.

Last week, I literally – literally – told a case that she should shoot for the stars.

Like an inspirational poster in an underfunded public school.

And it doesn’t matter if I feel sad or angry or lost, because Christmas is about putting some light into the world for others to see and feel.

So we light the lights when we can.

Even when we feel like a discounted version of ourselves.

13 thoughts on “Christmas 2022: June is Now a Hat, “WTF, Mariah Carey” and Being the Light

  1. Hello Hillarie! Only four? Thought you had more. Well, quality over quantity, yes?

    I’m on my own again this Christmas, but I’ve gone to town spoiling myself with good things to eat and drink and look at, just check my twitter account

    You and yours, Hillarie, have a good Christmas 💖🎄💖

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Happy Christmas, dear Simon. I have four regulars who comment… or I did. Helps to post more regularly, of course.

      On your own? Well, I love to hear you’re spoiling yourself and getting out of the house. That’s important! Ah, Twitter… I’ve somewhat abandoned social media due to my work schedule and my hatred for screens but I’ll wander there… just to see. 😉

      Hugs and love, Simon.xx


      1. Yes, on my own, yet surrounded by (as you saw on twitter) nice memories and ghosts of Christmas Past and Yet to Come, for I live in hope that good things shall come. Lots of love, Hillarie, and a Happy Christmas xx


  2. So good to see you out here again Hillarie. I love this message, especially the creepy dolls and the shitting dog friend. I also hate Mariah Carey’s general persona as some kind of sexy doll, but the woman can sing, I’ll give her that. Hubs and I consider Boney-M to be a classic Christmas album, so maybe don’t listen to me. Wishing you all their best over the holidays. You definitively light up the world for us and all your clients. Maybe that’s because you are so electric!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much, dear Naomi! AND… RIGHT?! Mariah Carey has quite a voice! You’ll find me lip syncing “Vision of Love” even to this day. But yeah… the sexy doll persona thing… gross times infinity. Evelyn and Giselle the tragic, rescued, murder pair could really show Mariah a thing or two about the essence of dolls. And haha Boney-M is great, there’s no denying that. Their Mary’s Boy Child’s video is worth a replay or six. For the record, I honestly haven’t heard Destiny’s Child’s album either. It could be wonderful. Aw… wishing you and yours the absolute best this magical time of year! Sending all the good electric manifestable your way! My clients… well, I have one client who only has me and his mom in his government phone I can’t figure out and he has called me every minute for the past 2 days. Not on purpose though. hahahaha

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Even though I don’t always comment, I read all that you write! I am an avid fan of your writing style describing your life and struggles in such an entertaining manner.😘 And your drawings also are entertaning!
    Someone broke June at an early age and you are who she needs to live her best, and only, life. Kudos to you.
    Hope you get through the Christmas season with good memories of past great ones if recent ones have failed you.❤🎅🤶

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Awwwww what a thing for me to read with June the Parrot on my shoulder right now. Thank you so much, dear Peggy! Those words from you mean the absolute world. Sending so much love to you. Wishing all the best that Christmas can give you (and that’s quite a bit as it’s CHRISTMAS). xxx


  4. Please. Right this moment. Enter the search term, “Orca salmon hat fad.” (Yes, somewhat of a non sequitur, but we work with what we have.)

    Merry belated Christmas, and you’re welcome.


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