Bullies, Minions and Balance in the Universe

Last Saturday it was really nice outside… the first genuinely nice day of Spring 2021. So the boy and I decided to venture out to see if we could sit outside and grab some food.

We parked and walked around and then… encountered a picnic bench of drunk people who were all staring at us or… me. I think they were making fun of my comfy Gumby and Pokey t-shirt because of their gestures as I was not wearing or looking remarkably noteworthy otherwise… ripped jeans and red tennis shoes.

the coolest shirt

My hair was tucked under a hat but I didn’t think that would evoke public mockery. We don’t live in South Beach or anything.

Also, I’m old and long out of the catty frey and was therefore caught off-guard because I should at this point be completely unseen to young entitled stupid bros plus one mean girl who looked like they we were all wearing either sports jerseys or all the clothes that Abercrombie and Fitch couldn’t sell one season and put aside in a free pile which sat outside some random college dorm.

So we moved on but I could feel my face burning. There were just so many of them.

Yet, I didn’t turn the cheek. And, when one of the boys wearing six years’ ago mall fashion said, giggling, “Omigod you’re so mean” to the girl who had made the comments, I casually responded as we walked past them, “Because she’s a bitch” and then casually flipped them all off as we walked away.

Not the most mature or ethical thing to do, I admit, but I felt very outnumbered and confused.

I wished I had some truly amazing move to bring out and knock them to their knees.

But I didn’t.

Thus, on such a beautiful day, the unhappy encounter took the wind right out of my sails.

Yet, perhaps the universe gave something back when the pretty host at the restaurant at which we arrived a half-hour later complimented me first-thing on my t-shirt, saying: “HI I LOVE YOUR SHIRT!”

and then pointed to the wall where there was a giant Gumby hanging on the wall.

And people continued to be very nice at that restaurant which drained me of the anger I was still holding onto.

I thankfully haven’t been picked on a lot in my life and, honestly, the airheads at the first restaurant were drunk and just being shitty and they weren’t bullying me by any stretch, but it reminded me of how many people I’ve known who had been bullied and how terrible people can make you feel.

I’ll take having sticks and stones thrown at me by mutes than having to listen to the dumb things that come out of insecure people’s faces.

I remember once I was out having a great time with friends on the capitol square in Madison, WI and we went to meet up with other friends at bar time and, as we approached, I saw this red-haired man yelling and laughing in the face of our friend who was physically pressed against the wall of an establishment’s entrance area.

As we got closer, I realized that the attacker was also making fun of my friends’ clothes.

I couldn’t believe it was happening.

It made so little sense on a shallow level because my super sweet and somewhat shy friend was dressed in a flannel and jeans and looked like most other people so I couldn’t believe this person was heckling him.

In any case, I flew toward them and jumped between my friend and him, pushed the ginger boy and his bad breath away from my friend, and told him that his Walgreens screen-printed check-out aisle shirt and him could just fuck right off back to Walgreens to buy a mirror.

Since I was about two feet taller than him, he had no choice and – cheeks red – turned around and – I hope – did just that.

I don’t understand why people have to be mean to other people but I know a few things for sure:

  1. Words hurt
  2. It’s important to step up, speak up and defend others who are being wronged
  3. Being kind feels so much better than being mean
  4. Maybe there’s balance in the universe sometimes
  5. Try to turn the other cheek but also fight back if you’re just not feeling especially WWJD
  6. Gumby and Pokey are the coolest and forget anyone who says otherwise

4. Music is medicine


There are a lot of jerks out there but, in this crazy world, they come with the territory.

I just wish they wouldn’t come out of the woodwork on the days you’re battling to stay afloat.

It’s like they have some kind of embedded alarm that detects when you’re feeling low… when alerted, they activate and find you.

But… oh well. In Milwaukee, the Water Street drunk-at-10AM party crowd atrocities seem to be wandering a bit further these days but a certain percentage of them will still end up in the Milwaukee River eventually so, while that’s not a very nice thought, it comforted me last Saturday.

Calling people names and wishing death and ruin upon them is/was not the right thing to do.

But I’m working on it. 😑

After all, the trees are starting to bud, I’m getting my second Pfizer shot tomorrow, I was able to see family I haven’t seen in a year last weekend… the key to survival is not dwelling on the stupid bad.

Give the stupid bad its fair share of time but no more than that.

It cuts into dance time and life is simply too short for some stupid bad to cut into dance time.


10 thoughts on “Bullies, Minions and Balance in the Universe

  1. I can never hear exactly what people are saying when they point and stare, it seems like rude people mumble a lot. Or they doppler as they shout something unintelligible as they drive by. I decided if I can’t actually understand what people are saying I will just pretend they were saying I was pretty. It works sometimes.

    Once I was at a bar wearing a Linux t-shirt with a big cute penguin on it. And a woman actually walked up to me and said “Why would you wear something like that to a BAR?” And I said “So that hot rude girls will come up and talk to me.” She sort of stumbled away and was probably never sure if being hot canceled out rude (totally not). The reason I wore it to a bar was it was clean and I liked it. The same reason normal people wear their clothes anywhere.

    Making fun of someone’s appearance shows so very little class and lots of privilege.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Sigh. Yes. It’s been years since I’ve had to deal with this kind of thing. Mostly because I stopped going out. And, when I do go out, I prepare for war. 😂🦖 But… in the in-between moments… I’m vulnerable.😔

      People who care about what’s on a shirt are just… not worth any time. But good for you for having a solid mindset and quick responses when out. 🖤 You ARE pretty. 😘

      I was just feeling quite low and… that’s when they attack. Rebounding…


  2. Oh my god, very often people are the worst, but not you, you’re amazing! I loooooove that you said that to her, it really made me laugh. I would want to yell “GET DEAD FUCKFACE!” at her but I would really be thinking of Trump.


    Liked by 2 people

    1. Awwwww thank you so much my beloved BFF. 😭 She generically looked like she WOULD be mean (stereotypical mean girl face) which would have been funny if I wasn’t so shocked/hurt. 😂

      Privilege creates monsters.

      Love you so much xxxxxxoxoxox


    1. Hahaha aw. 😘 Well, I do admire my casual quick “you can’t ever hurt me” manner but… I do feel a bit bad about being middle-aged and calling some child a name. 😂 But… thank you, dear Lisa. 😘

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Gumby and Pokey are the best and I played with them as kids, so I know this to be true. I feel this post because sometimes you just have to stand up for yourself and others. I remember once a teenage student I was working with called me some bad name in French and I snapped back that she was being an impossible bitch. After that, she was a bit more respectful, to be honest. We can’t be perfectly behaved all the time, especially when others are dumping their own garbage onto our heads. The trick is to read the situation and stay safe.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. So true! I also had little Gumby and Pokey toys I played with too! 🥰I love them. Oh isn’t the world a hostile place? Your student… oh wow. I’m so glad she felt chastised and improved her behavior. I don’t think there is any hope for the picnic bench lot but… who knows. 😂 You’re so right… read the situation and stay safe. 🖤


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