Hello to my four readers! Are you still alive? Am I? Do we all still have Wi-Fi? If you’re in any of the places which has suffered a devastating tornado or hurricane or blizzard or war or uprising, or if you live in Milwaukee proper… you may not now have life or internet access. If […]
Tag: sadness
You’ve Been Too Much, Summer: Halloween, Save Us All
I think the last time I enjoyed summer was back when I was a kid. Back then, it was all waterparks and swimming pools and fireworks and staying over at friends’ houses and running around in the dark of our neighborhoods playing Ghosts in the Graveyard, Witches Come Out Tonight and other shocking children’s games. […]
Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all!
“Peace and love.” Easy to say but super difficult to feel. Yet, while I’m super tired out from an especially hellish month of work and also family drama and other life stuff… … I’m still doing my best to channel George Michael and hold on to some Christmas cheer. As such, I’m making a list […]
So This Week Happened…
It’s been a rough week. Earlier, I found out a dear friend died in a motorcycle accident. A utility van crossed the center line and, by doing so, ended her life. It was sudden and still feels unreal and… irritating. Like, I am super irritated about this. Not fair. Not cool and I don’t want […]
The Darkness
There are some nights – tonight and last night – where I think “I’m just going to bed. This day has felt too terrible too long and it simply needs to end. Here’s to tomorrow.” But then tomorrow comes. And it feels the same. My fucking IUD removal (or Mirena crash which many doctors deny) […]
Get It Out: Art Saves
I just got news that a rather big happening which was going to change life as my husband and I know it is probably no longer happening. It was all probably not but maybe happening… then definitely happening… and now… probably not happening once again?! Life, man. It’s a real thing. Before that ambivalent-yet-leaning-towards-bad news, […]
What Do You See?
This post is about death, grief, loss, unexplained happenings and also murals… Fair warning and, if you’re here for the murals, just scroll down to the end. The Context/Background So I wrote a ghostly storybook ⬇️ And in this book I summarize all the scary, unexplained and sometimes magical stuff which happened when my husband […]
😫? Escape With Me to Spain: Misadventures in Málaga
You never know when a grief attack will hit. Yesterday I had a full-blown, out-of-left-field grief attack when listening to a song I always listen to but, for whatever reason, when the song lyrics came to this certain part yesterday… I completely lost it. It’s like all the oxygen was sucked out of my body […]
Redundantly, What’s the Point?
I’m sure I’m not the only one who at times wonders: I just got home from private communion as I don’t attend the church services because, despite precautions taken by my church, it’s just indoors in a crowd and all this singing and talking and… I’m not someone who seeks out crowds to start with. […]
Life After
My mind is taking things into its own hands lately. I think this because on Tuesday I had some epileptic twitches in my face and through my fingers which aren’t supposed to happen. The electricity is breaking free. Oi. So I think my mind took care of that because I slept so deeply Tuesday night […]
Moving and the Struggle to Let Go/Avoid Having to Let Go
Aha! Book production is getting a bit more streamlined! My husband has taken over this end of the process as he doesn’t have epilepsy and his hands work better for him. I am secretly pleased that we use a typewriter as the binding weight. Yeah, we have a vintage typewriter which we haul around with […]
Dog or Gremlin
Tuesday marked the 13th year my husband and I have been legally married. Through thick and thin, we have remained married. And now we are older. I should be a writer for Hallmark, I know. And, once we thought about it, since we dated for 5-6 years, we have been together FORFUCKINGEVER. Love him. But […]
Anniversaries and Holidays Which Evoke All Emotions
When you experience loss, you suddenly have new days to dread. Or celebrate. It depends on how you’re coping with your loss. I honestly don’t know anyone who genuinely looks forward to a death anniversary like “OH WOW IT’S ALMOST THE DAY MOM DIED. I CAN’T WAIT TO CELEBRATE HER!!!” but I’m sure you’re out […]
Angels in a Not Yet Broken Phone
Five and a half years after being placed on hospice, my mom died in June 2017 at the age of 64. I organized the funeral and then the funeral happened and then I returned to our house and my husband David went to work and our house was just empty and quiet and I couldn’t […]
The Outsiders
Our house activity climaxed with my beloved mom’s fight to defy death in her final months battling frontotemporal degeneration (FTD). New things started to happen which didn’t seem particularly paranormal as they involved tangible, organic creatures who were simply behaving oddly. Specifically, the animals started to mobilize. By this point, we had lived in our […]
Brain Wars!!! 